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marriage or not please read this,,
“When I got home that night as...
my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to
tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her
eyes.
Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had
to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the
topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she
asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her
angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a
man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew
she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could
hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I
didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep
sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she
could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced
at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of
her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted
time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for
I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which
was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of
release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks
seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came
back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I
didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast
because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up,
she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I
turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she
presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but
needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that
one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her
reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she
didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This
was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall
how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She
requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our
bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy.
Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She
laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she
applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we
both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy
in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to
the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in
my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about
the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the
office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more
easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her
blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a
long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine
wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its
toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy
returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was
growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry
her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me
stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She
tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she
sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she
had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more
easily.
Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and
bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her
head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s
time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out
had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son
to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I
was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her
in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the
hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her
body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her
much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my
arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her
tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I
drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the
door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked
upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not
want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and
then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her
hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life
was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our
lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that
since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to
hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She
gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I
walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I
ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to
write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning
until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home,
flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find
my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months
and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die
soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from
our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the
eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….
The small details
of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the
mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an
environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in
themselves.
So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do
those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real
happy marriage!
If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are
people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave
up.”
I saw this on the internet.. I thought I would share this on tumblr to my followers and randoms.
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